An Artist Book from year’s Past
I was reminded today of this artist book that I made several years ago. The image below is on my Flickr photo stream and a wonderful fan just added it to her favorites list this morning, which “ping-ed” me and led me to look at this again.
"Self Portrait Evolution" ©Ayn Hanna (Artist Book - scroll format; ink, crayon, paper, tree branch, beads, linen fabric)
I made this in the mid 90’s, after spending 3 years living in New York City and having returned to Colorado. I was in a big Artists’ Book “phase” during that time and made several artists’ books using a variety of handmade bindings. (Wikipedia defines Artists’ Books as: works of art realized in the form of a book. They are often published in small editions, though sometimes they are produced as one-of-a-kind objects referred to as “uniques”.)
This one is a drawing made using water-soluble crayons on 100% rag paper, which I fused to linen fabric (to make it stronger) and then made it into a scroll by stitching a tree branch (found in my backyard) to one end of it.
I was in an introspective mood and made this self portrait scroll book and another self portrait woodcut (shown below), during this time period. Body image has been a struggle for me pretty much my whole life and I’ve always been a rather voluptuous gal, so these self portraits kind of speak to that.
"Self Portrait" ©Ayn Hanna (Woodcut printed in black on white rice paper), 1997.
Inspiration from older work
I saw a “tweet” recently from author Chris Guillebeau that said “If you’re not embarrassed by work you did years ago, you probably haven’t evolved or developed much.” In some ways, I do agree with this quote – looking back at work I did years ago, I sometimes feel a little embarrassed, but I also am able to put myself back in those shoes I was standing in at the time and have empathy for where I was at and recognize how much I know now that I didn’t know then.
So, it’s more of a celebration for me to look at older work and remember who I was then and enjoy the memories and the path I’ve traveled since then.
What struck me most when I revisited this “Self Portrait Evolution” artist book image this morning was remembering how wonderful it was to do that drawing, making the marks on that luscious rag paper, building up the volume of those (container) forms, and the color. Drawing – it’s what art is all about for me. No matter what medium I’m working in and whether it’s 2D or 3D, Drawing is paramount.
When I saw my scroll book again, I said, “Ya, that’s a good drawing. I want to do more of that.”
Glad it’s a holiday weekend and I’m in full Art Mode. I’m excited to have some time in the studio and can’t wait to see what comes of that. Will check back in here next week and share some updates from the studio weekend.
Have you looked at any work you did years ago recently? How did it make you feel?
This is great! I remember that work. I also remember when you worked out in the cold garage at our Downing Court palace. Was this work created during that time? You are continually amazing!
My Daughter!
Yep, you remember it well. I did create both of these in the cold garage space at Downing court! XO
“embarrassed”? well, with some, but i think sometimes too when you look back you can see freer expression and less inhibition about trying new media or subjects. i have started looking at old work with older wiser eyes and see common threads that i have lost through preciousness and the search for acceptance. in that respect i mean being part of the trend or on a bandwagon rather than acceptance of what i do because i do it, rather than “this is what is popular”. The origins of our own art can be a minefield or a mine of new motherlodes 🙂
Arlee, great insight, I know what you mean. There is so much to appreciate looking back at older work with wiser eyes, especially when we re-connect with those wonderful expressions of self, those common threads of work done because “it’s what you do” not having anything to do with trying to gain acceptance. It is an interesting path to become aware of and retain those expressions of self while navigating a career in art, isn’t it?
I’m glad I read this, I was thinking about weeding out some of my old stuff, but now should look back and appreciate the process. Thanks.
Oh ya, don’t weed it out….there’s so much good history there, and insightful to revisit it.
What a wonderful question. My older work mostly mortifies me–that I put it out there, let others see, thought it was any “good”–but yes, it does show where I was and how I’ve evolved. Of course, I expect I’ll feel the same way about current work in a few years. This was good to ponder.
I love–really love–your self portraits, especially the morphing pear. Lovely!
Thanks Ali, yes, it is good to ponder. And isn’t it great to realize that work we’re doing now, we’ll likely look back on much differently in a few years? I find that realizing that sometimes helps me “lighten up” a bit and take myself and life less seriously, feels good – I think sometimes we get bogged down in way too much “seriousity” 🙂
interesting to think about…but do we think da Vinci is looking down from somewheres mumbling to himself “dang, forgot to paint the eyebrows”?
everything we make and do is part of the process of growing into who we are meant to be. sometimes things are not pretty, but they are all important.
and it’s what matters to you that counts…
Nah, I’m sure he’s not lamenting any of his work.
And so true, it’s all necessary to the becoming isn’t it? Wherever we’re at in the process is exactly where we’re meant to be! I’m not the same person I was 5 years ago, or yesterday, or even 5 minutes ago and that’s pretty cool.
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